As always, there is a relevant XKCD.
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There honestly is an XKCD for everything
“If only there was a way to make online dating MORE of a dystopian hellscape”
“You’re not gonna believe this…”
Hunger Games! … it starts with 20 random players and the last two remaining individuals of any sex or orientation are paired off as a happy couple
Hang the DJ?
I volunteer as tribute.
One of the most common complaints I read about dating apps is how many bots there are, so yeah, for sure add AI into the mix. That’s definitely what people want. Also, if you have to use AI to start a conversation, what are you gonna do when you meet someone in person? Match has really done the most to ruin online dating over the last several years, though, so this just seems like another step on the same path.
all Tinder cares about is keeping you swiping, with your eyes on the screen.
Yeah they failed at that, at least for me. I deleted my one account over a year ago and can’t see myself ever going back. Apps are borderline useless at this point and I’d rather die alone than slog through one ever again.
They don’t need to retain users for very long, they just need to keep you around as long as possible.
There’s always new single people aging into the dating pool, and thanks to Apple, the ones aging into it now are too tech illiterate, susceptible to lock-in tactics, brand loyal, and resistant to trying alternatives if it’s even marginally less popular or well known. All of which guarantees a steady flow of new singles to milk dry.
The dating app scene is honestly one of the best examples out there of how fucked this unregulated app market is. Any time an app started to grow, started to chip away at the entrenchment of Match, they just bought it. It provided zero benefit to customers to let it happen, in fact it has made it all demonstrably worse.
They make money with people looking for dates, not with people having found them.
After x many failed conversations Tinder can now ask you if you would want to try an AI dating service. For the lonely losers who need some help. All for a monthly subscription.
You could wear your Apple Vision Pro on the date and use Tinder AI to get live prompts like a modern Cyrano de Bergerac.
If done right it could actually be decent for dealing with bots because it could keep them all busy wasting the bot master’s money
Also, if you have to use AI to start a conversation, what are you gonna do when you meet someone in person?
Oops! Didn’t work out. Back to the dating pool again.
Also, if you want to upgrade from Gold dating pool to Platinum dating pool, please insert another $20 into the phone.
It used to be bots. Now it’s one-time profiles of chicks adding their Instagram and OnlyFans.
I see AI chatting with bots in a nonstop loop soon… that’s okay, they can date each other!
Local AI girlfriend available in your area.
saying AI will help employees with “work-related tasks.”
So, the nonexistent support and moderation teams will be replaced with AI. End users will notice no difference there.
The company says it plans to use the AI for communications, coding, design, analysis, building templates, and eliminating other repetitive tasks.
Yup, end users will match with AI bots, because why not. “Oh, honey, if only you upgraded your plan to PLATINUM DIAMOND BLACK PLUS, I’d be willing to go out with you!”
Match Group has been explicit that it thinks it will be good for its business and the world if just about every part of its users’ interactions is shaped and filtered through the algorithmic lens of artificial intelligence.
Too bad “quantic wishing” (what those “quantic coaches” scammers peddle) doesn’t work, otherwise everything Match Group owns would catch fire real soon.
Yup, end users will match with AI bots, because why not.
Why not? Because that’s fucking stupid, that’s why not. Unless they want to torpedo their business, it’s probably customer support…since that’s what a lot of companies already use AI for.
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It’s that black mirror episode about the dating simulator.
While you can’t date a chatbot, I’m certain it will fill a certain sexting niche where no real meeting is expected.
For me it would depend, of course, on how good that chatbot is at discussing SW EU, Middle-Earth, Honorverse, Babylon V, SG-1, a smaller fantasy series not sure if translated from Russian, and a few historical periods I’m interested in, Dao De Jing, Jewish religious philosophy (I suck at it, but love voicing my opinions), some poetry united not by genre, but by some feeling hard to detect, POV-Ray, Unix, some other things in computing, and maybe a few other things.
Or I could man up and text that girl not yet ignoring me and complimenting too often, but that wouldn’t require Tinder, so I dunno.
Go Hadjar go
In the future, people’s designated AIs will determine compatibility with other’s designated AIs.
If our many self-created crises don’t decimate our species and collapse civilization at least. Then those left might actually have to pro-socially interact and cooperate with each other to survive. Scary thought, I know. How the hell are you supposed win and fuck over the other person to get more if you have to cooperate?!
Its just going to be bots making content and shit for other bots to consume.
We pretend to work and they pretend to pay us.
I’m pretending to work right now. Well, not really pretending. I’m just not working when I’m supposed to be. Last 10 minutes of the day. Fuck it.
Preach brother. I’ve fucked around for 3 hours today so far.
5 min countdown!
Really sticking it to the man.
So they can replace the manually faked women by AI generated ones?
Free gpt searches when you match
Hang the DJ
It would be interesting to gate actual users behind a week long evaluation… I’m not sure I want ai doing it, but have a trial period to see how active a user is, what they’re looking to use the app for, how they communicate, I’d bet you could get much more accurate results… But then it would also limit the amount of people you work with.
Just wait til AI makes decisions about your worthiness as an individual. Need a loan? Consult the Demon Box. Need an organ transplant? Demon Box. Eligible for food stamps? The Demon Box has decreed that you must be eliminated
Is the Demon Box protocol-compatible with the orphan crushing machine?
No, that would not be dystopian enough.
So we’re teaching it how to be awful? Best part is it’s also getting okcupid so AI is about to get a hell of a lot kinkier, too.
